How quickly a day can change

Yesterday started out on such a nice note and then quickly went south in the afternoon.

I did not work out. But I did walk 1.9 miles home from a therapy appointment, so I think that counts. I find it interesting that when I am anxious, which I have been since yesterday afternoon, I can channel the nervous energy in good ways, like walking and finally tidying up my apartment post-party.

But I am exhausted because I did not sleep well last night due to this anxiety. Without getting into that, I will say I think there must be a special place in hell (if there is a hell) for those who intentionally, recklessly or knowingly cause others fear and pain. I am feeling lots of that right now. But I am taking steps to deal with it, hoping to survive the emotional storm.

Picking up the pen

For the last several days, I have had blog posts rolling around in my head. It took me until today to remember the login for this blog, but I felt determined to write. I am happy to live in this town, near my family. But I still have so much work to do on me. Because I want so much more and I need to make changes to have it.

I want to be physically fit again. So tomorrow, I will work out. The first day of many, but it's a start.

I want to be mentally healthy, to keep the depression in check and be at my best in all areas of my life. So tomorrow, I will see a therapist for the first time since moving. She may or may not be the right one, but I won't know until I go.

And I want to recapture the approach to work that got me where I am today--approaching my work with vigor and organization and humor. That starts tomorrow, too.

Baby steps. But steps, nonetheless.